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Friends.

So it was suggested this summer that I am not a good friend. That was truly one of the most hurtful things, in a long list of things, that has ever been said about me. Let me clarify; it was said that I turn on my friends. Well 1st, I was playing a game this summer. A game where friendship and loyalty are famously tested. A game where strangers meet and compete. A game where 4 years ago I lost sight of the fact that I was competing for money and chose friendship over cash. And was famously punished for that transgression. Believe me I went into All-Stars with one loyalty this time: me. I wasn’t looking for friends, I was searching for cash and prizes.

Am I really friends with anyone from Big Brother? In all honesty I’d have to say no. Not while on the show anyway. Yes, I like some of those knuckleheads. I count Kiki, Diane and Erika as my pals. James and Sarah I love. Janelle too. Big Willie Wikle is my bud. I think fondly of Roddy though we’ll never be friends. A few people I hate and never wanna lay eyes on again. Which is cool. You aren’t going to be friends with everyone you meet.

I am best friends with Lisa from BB3. She’s the newest member of that short list. We went through an amazing, horrible, fun, scary experience together. It was a weird way to meet. To get to know each other. It wasn’t until after the cameras stopped rolling and the true time it takes for a friendship to occur happened, that we became friends and then best friends. Lisa and I have been through so much together. I love her like a sister and trust her like family. We’ve laughed together, cried together, gotten too drunk and too stupid together. We’ve seen each other through highs and lows. We’ve fought, even stopped speaking to each other. Only to realize there’s no one we’d rather talk to.

I’m saddened to this day the producers talked to Amy about me during All-Stars. To let Amy tell it they twisted her words. Do we need further proof that they wanted to re-create the “Amy & Marcellas BB3” story-line? Janelle is no Amy. Amy is no Janelle. And the Marcellas that knows and loves those 2 fierce creatures isn’t the one that hung out in Studio City this summer. That’s the thing; when you are thrown together in the BB house it creates these immense emotional attachments that aren’t based in reality. You laugh harder, hate more, love intenser and that is not the basis for a real friendship. It’s @ most a start.

That’s what I have with my BB family. The start of friendships.

It’s interesting the “How & the Why” of BB friendships. How did Roddy and Josh become such good friends? Or Will and Mike? What do Danielle and Jason have in common? What do Lisa and I talk about? Diane and Will W? What’s that about? All I know is this, I’m not a bad friend. I’d throw myself in front of a bullet for my girls. I have a core group of friends I’ve been best with for over 10 years now. These are the women the producers should have talked to during BB All-Stars. Not people I competed against for money. People who I @ best barely knew. Did you want the truth Arnold and Alison? Or did you just want to destroy what you helped create?

Wow. This post was supposed to be be about how I spent Thanksgiving and a bit about last weekend. I majorly digressed! Anyway congrats to someone I do love. Who I’ve laughed with and cut-up with and I hope to grow to be true friends with.

Janelle you are the All-Star. Work your show.

M*